Why Is She Reluctant to Send Me Natural Photos?

Posted on Sep 9, 2013 by in Ask an Expert

Chinese Women For Marriage

Online dating is becoming increasingly hot nowadays. More and more and western men are likely to find a dreamed wife via online dating websites. Meanwhile, there is a certain number of male members suspectful about the realness of the ladies’ photos. They ask the ladies who they’re interested in and dating with to send the natural photos; while,not every lady accepts their requirements. They’re very confused why the ladies refused to do that. Today, Rebecca would help you find an answer by beginning with Raymond’s story.


Hi Rebecca,

I have been a member here for about 5 months, and been corresponding with one lady for more than 2 months. She seems by the emails we have exchanged a very nice lady. She looks stunning in her profile photos, and I have to admit that her beauty is the reason I started writing to her in the first place. I know many of the ladies’ profile photos are”enhanced”. So I asked her to send me some natural photos. She promised to send me real life photos of herself and her family soon, but two weeks have passed, and I still haven’t received them. She kept on sending me those glamorous studio photos in her letters. I have been very patient in this time but i am having doubts about her now. I can give it more time but it soaks up the credits to find out whether I am going to get some real pictures or not. Should I be more patient or is it time to move on with another lady?




Hi Raymond

It has always been common to have professional photos done in China, and nowadays Photoshop makes miracles, too. So it’s true that the ladies may look very different in real life compared to their profile photos.

Keep in mind that Chinese women are very self conscious about their looks. There is a high bar for what is considered good looking to the Chinese eye. Also, good looks are attached to opportunities that are otherwise not available to those without them (jobs, relationships, etc.). That’s why you see so many beauty shots here on Chnlove because it’s important for the ladies to put their best foot forward as they know exactly how many people are vying for these limited opportunities. With that said, it may not be that hard to understand why a lady is reluctant to send you natural photos. Without all the perfect makeup and lighting, she may look much less attractive in real life. She could be worried that you would lose interest in her once you see her real life photos. The stronger her feelings towards you, the more worried she would be about losing you. So what I suggest is that you should reassure your lady that you are only interested in seeing her true beauty. You have to present the request in a way that will allow her to expose a vulnerable side which is one without the makeup or an “enhanced” photo. And if she is still reluctant to send you natural photos after your repeated requests, then maybe it’s time for you to move on with another lady. After all, if she is so uncomfortable with her own looks, how is she supposed to meet you face to face in the future?

Everyone appreciates a beautiful face, but looks fade over time. What really counts is inner compatibility and what the lady is on the inside. If you’re looking for someone to be with you to the end of time, then looks are only a small part of what you should be looking for. I hope you can work things out with your lady soon!

Warm Regards,


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